Friday, March 11, 2011

Dear MaryJanes June 20th

Inside of card reads. "Just wondering what kind of condition urine."


  1. i always look forward to reading your posts. Feel the love coming through in your letters to your baby. So so sweet. Adore it. And even though it's so personal, i find it so lovely you are willing to put it out there and share it with the world. Thank you for that....

  2. Els,
    You are always so sweet to post a comment to let us know that someone is getting something from our bundle of letters.
    Why did we decide to put it right out there for the world to see??
    Well, maybe to deal with life head on! To put the past in the past and move forward.
    To show that even though you get pregnant before you are married, and even if it is by the man you are not meant to be with, you can manage. I kept my baby, I never look back and wonder, "what if?" She is my child, she is part of me.
    To share with others that might wonder about having only one child, yes, it is ok!
    To say that there is another way to raise a child other than to push them in all directions that you think they should go. I was strict with MJ while she was young, yet I gave her freedoms as she earned them. It was so much easier as she understood the boundaries I set. She knew I meant what I said. Yet in the same breathe, I will say that I talked to her as an equal, as a mature person that could handle the truth. I explained things to her, I did not shelter her from everything real, good or bad. I did not want her to think the world was a fairy tale. I listened to her, and let her have her own voice full of her own opinions, often very different from my own. I encouraged her, read to her...made up funny stories in place of the actual words. I exposed her to a variety of activities without pushing her in any certain direction. It was and is her path, she alone needs to figure out which way it leads her.
    I let her know that everyone, even adults make mistakes, and that she should always listen to the little voice inside of her. Stay true to herself.
    And I suppose the one thing I did that was my own way of raising her, I was me, silly and goofy, unconventional, honest and supportive. I hugged her and not only told her that I loved her, I showed her. I always stood beside her, not in front, but along side of her.
    And with all of my own mistakes with my own life, I asked her not to make the same, that she would make her own mistakes apart from mine.
    And that is why it is all out there....simple letters from a mother to her daughter, daughter to a mother as real as it gets.
    I raised a beautiful, intelligent, funny, creative, resourceful,strong, respectful, tender heated little girl.....ok, so she is 28!