Image by Jen Kiaba photography
Reading this now I vaguely recall this gesture of raising a pinky as a sign of love. Funny to know now where it came from. My memory of it had to be from you and my father. How I wish that it could have been Bill instead. I remember many times asking about your past loves, before dad, and being told of Bill and how smitten he was with you. But I was never told that you had given it another shot after I had joined your life. Obviously, I was too young to create memories of him myself. I wish he had worked out for you. I wish you could have felt for him what he did for you. I wish you could have had some stability and support in your life. Maybe I could have avoided my daddy issues and had a normal healthy relationship with an adult male had he been in our lives.
I think it strange that you could not bring yourself to find happiness with him, a man who loved and cared for you, yet you tried so hard to find happiness with my father who was selfish and hurtful. I find in life that I am rarely lead by my heart and always make decisions with my mind. Perhaps this is why.
Image by MFAYRE Photography
Love,
MaryJanes
I agree with you MaryJanes. Everything that happens in our lives and the people that are in them shape who we are. While sometimes and people might not be so pleasant we grow from that experience and become the people that we were meant to be!
ReplyDeleteI love reading both of your blogs!
-Julie
~Julie,
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for all of your nice comments. I was just asking MaryJanes if this blog was worthy of continuing. I wondered if sharing these letters was just too "out there" and that maybe no one was really reading it. She assured me that blogs take time, and esp this type of blog. I am glad to know that there is a faithful reader out there. I have the hopes that sharing our real story, no holding back, everything out there in true honest letters between a mother and daughter, might be of some insight to other young mothers that might find themselves asking them selves, "I am I doing the right thing as a mother?" I look back now and see things that were not clear to me then, mistakes I made as a parent. And now I see MaryJanes with her children, and sse that she isn't making the same mistakes as I did, she is just creating her own..LOL! Sorry MJs, but it's true. And this is the kind of relationship we have, REAL.
I love You MaryJanes, and there is something you once told me, they were the nicest words that were ever spoken to me. I told you, "I know that I was a really good mother, but you are a better mom than I was." You replied with, "But mom, you are a better grandmother than I am a mother." Those words will stay with me forever. Thank you for them!
Love,
Galoshes
This is really a beautiful blog...so real, as you say, that I found the letters riveting. Thank you for sharing this...
ReplyDeleteLinda,
ReplyDeleteI am so glad you took the time to look at our blog and comment.
Thank you kindly!
~Galoshes
Please, please continue with this blog! I have been checking back daily to read the letters. I am a young mother myself with a young daughter and another baby on the way and I constantly question whether I am being the best mother that I can be. The honesty and love that is evident between you two is beautiful and refreshing and I can only hope to cultivate that between myself and my children. I've never been one to leave comments on blogs but I felt compelled to do so this time. Thank you for sharing your story!
ReplyDeleteAndrea
Andrea,
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for leaving such a nice comment. My mom has been a bit insecure about sharing the story (although it was her idea and she is very much enjoying this) it is very personal things we are putting out there. I promise that although obviously some dark things happened in the early years we are very happy people in the end and will share in complete honest what goes on between the two of us. I hope the perspectives I give looking back at her letter and decisions now that I'm gown help you decide what's important (and what's not) for you and your kids! We will most certainly continue the blog (probably sharing a lot more than you want to know LOL).
Congratulations about your baby on the way! Thanks for reading!
MaryJanes
This blog is just like reading a good book... I cannot wait for the next post to know more of your story! :)
ReplyDeleteYou have a beautiful way of writing and I am captured by it!
Please keep it up! : )
Fawn,
ReplyDeleteYour comment was very much appreciated!
Thank you kindly!
~Galoshes
beautiful...just started reading this and I think I may have to finish the whole series tonight. It makes me wish I had a better relationship with my mother.
ReplyDelete